Thursday, December 10, 2009

WEIRD WIDE WORLD OF CHRISTMAS TREES +DECEMBER NEWS BULLETINS




MERRY ALMOST CHRISTMAS





WEIRD WIDE WORLD OF CHRISTMAS TREES 2009




A Christmas tree is defined as a decorated evergreen coniferous tree, real or artificial, and a popular tradition associated with the celebration of Christmas. The custom of erecting a Christmas tree can be traced to 16th century Northern Germany.



A Christmas tree in 1848





Around 1900........






Around 1950............. this is similar to the ones I grew up with.






An outdoor Xmas tree at the Rockefeller Center in NY.




An artificial indoor tree......






A real indoor tree.......







Besides these traditional trees, there seems to be an infinite number of other types of Xmas trees...






Outdoor tree with a few too many hot lights......











Zoobee's tree decorated by the Tiny Terrors...... including....









Santa on a Mallard.....and....








Spike's stocking hanging next to the tree......along with..



Voo's......

Manti, UT



A beer bottle tree like the one in Riley's apartment......

Provo, Ut



Kristin stands next to the Farm Bureau Christmas tree
with it's skull lights and one ornament....

Manti, UT






A pink Christmas tree??????








A Tiger Woods Christmas tree.....






Another outdoor artificial tree......






A white flocked tree ...... very popular in the 1960s.






A black flocked Christmas tree, very popular with my sister, Lil Lois. Notice the unique skull arrangement....


Los Angeles, CA













A colored glass tree...













A Kramer Tree

My good friend Kramer in Vermont often forgets when it's time to take down his Christmas tree....

Burlington, VT





A Polly Tree

Santa Fe, NM

Note: My nephew, Scroge Marconi, is such a tight ass that he won't buy a real tree. Instead, he makes his lovely wife, Polly, wear this Xmas tree outfit, stand over presents in a corner on Christmas morning, and watch their darling children open their "gifts" that they had to pay for themselves.





A really ugly tree....





A weirdly lighted type tree...






Here is a tree decorated with a very small woman that looks like Michelle Pfeiffer...








A Red Neck tree like the one in the front room of Randy Griffin AKA Officer Dangle AKA Mad Cow....

Lehi, UT



This tree is made entirely of tinsel...






Here is another 1950s tree belonging to movie star Julie Adams......
(movie star in "The Creature From The Black Lagoon")




Here is a tree that is exactly like the one I had while attending Utah State University with Jim Petersen in 1968. However, this tree may be standing up a little better than ours.....


























Another beer bottle tree like the one in Wyatt's apartment.....

Provo, UT




A very bright outside tree......






Former Miss Manti pageant winners decorating the Manti City Xmas tree....






A Jacques Cousteau Xmas tree.....




















The Cat Woman's wine bottle tree.....
Seattle, WA

























A perky little tree with red trimmings......




Jayne Mansfield stands on a stool, hoping to not fall over forward, as she decorates the top of her Xmas tree in 1957.......







My own personal favorite......





An outdoor Xmas tree at Oil Can's house.....

Ephraim, UT




















A pac-man tree........





















Marilyn Monroe tree ornaments.......
















F Bomb's Xmas tree...........
Seattle, WA





Little Martha erected and decorated this tree after a night out with the girls. I think Vespa Queen, Double Clutch, Tina Turner, and The Soup Nazi must have helped her.

Provo, UT























President Obama's tree......

Washington, DC




Another outdoor tree at Oil Can's........................

Ephraim, UT




















Stainless Steel Stabile wanted to be a little different last Xams and ended up doing this. This is also the way he installs bathtubs.

Berkeley, CA



A tree from the 1940s.....



As you can see, Xmas trees are like snow flakes, with no two being exactly the same. As long as you have one, that's what counts.....


















DECEMBER NEWS OF THE WEIRD

NEWS FLASH ...NEWS FLASH.... NEWS FLASH




CHRISTMAS RIVALRIES GET OUT OF HAND




DATE LINE: MANTI, UTAH




Two brothers, who are normally the very best of friends, have crossed the line into insanity this Christmas season. At least, one of the brothers did. Andy Cox is a mild mannered, well liked, church going, and respected businessman in Manti, Utah. He is also a very kind family man and pillar of the community. His brother, Karl, is almost as good. Every year they try to outdo each other in, what used to be, a friendly rivalry concerning outdoor Christmas decorations. This year, Andy became infuriated when Karl's house seemed to be getting most of the compliments.
Their houses were decorated very similar with one exception. Karl's house displayed a very unique and attractive star on the front of his roof. Not to be out done.......

ANDY COX WENT GRISWOLD..


(see below)








The Andy Cox home




NEWS FLASH -- NEWS FLASH-- NEWS FLASH

DATELINE: EPHRAIM, UT

Contrary to recent newspaper headlines around the nation, Oil Can denies that he has ever had an affair with Tiger Woods. Mr. Can was quoted as saying "These are a vicious pack of lies and slandering statements that have no ounce of truth in them what so ever. My imppecible reputation as a leader in the community and a big wheel in the school distract has suffered
irreparable damage."

Tiger Woods refuses to comment.....



Oil Can during happier times......








MR. AND MRS TIGER WOODS

The day after Thanksgiving.



NEWS FLASH --- NEWS FLASH - NEWS FLASH

DATELINE: LOS ANGELES, CA

Joyce Eliason AKA Lil Lois has come forward insisting that her name and number are on Tiger Wood's cell phone. As many readers know Ms. Eliason is a sponsor of this blog, a quiz judge on this blog, and a frequent quiz winner on this blog. She is quoted as saying "I gave the best years of my life to that sleazy little bastard and the son of a bitch won't even return my calls."
Mr. Woods has refused to comment....



Ms Eliason





NEWS FLASH--- NEWS FLASH----NEWS FLASH

DATELINE: POINT BARROW, ALASKA

Santa may be a little slower making the rounds this year. He has one less flying reindeer to help pull the load. Yes, you heard correctly. Santa's faithful reindeer, Blitzen, was recently "harvested" by ex Alaskan governor, Sarah Palin. Mrs. Palin was quoted as saying, "Sure I knew it was Blitzen, but, I am out of work, have many mouths to feed, Bristol is knocked up again,and my lazy ass husband, Todd, can't hold down a job. Besides that, I truly believe that killing reindeer is what Christmas is all about."

Blitzen's obituary will be published in the Arctic Messenger this coming Tuesday.



SARAH BLASTS BLITZEN

Piper Palin, Sarah Palin, and Blitzen (deceased).



That's all the news that is news till next week.

Christmas Wreath Rita says......

"There are "barely" 10 shopping days till Xmas...."



Next week ...... Xmas surprises


......voo










3 comments:

oil can said...

Loved the trees... and the lights... and the 50's pin-ups... and Joyce's picture... FYI, Tiger did make the call and explained that it was a mix up... it was really "Elin" that was involved with both OC and Joyce...

joyce Eliason said...

I have no idea where this vicious rumor came from. I do not know Tiger Woods--I've never even heard of Tiger Woods. I don't like golf-- I never ever said he was a sleazy bastard or a son-of-a-bitch because I don't use bad language. I have never been involved with a person called Elin.

The gentleman who ruined my life-- the one who took all my good years and kept me hidden away and our relationship a secret-- and who never ever calls me back or helps me out financially is not Tiger Woods-- but Oil Can!

oil can said...

Oh Ms. Geoyce... It felt so good to hear you finally call me a gentleman ... after all these years of opposite bantering.. it makes all your other complements pale in comparison... It is such an honor to know and associate with you.. and in that Spirit ... a very generous donation has been made this Holiday season in your name to the Tiger Woods Foundation for Battered Vehicles... I love you Ms. J... always have .. always will... but even more this holiday season!

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